Haven't weighed in....

for a few days. When I don't take my adderall pill, I binge like a mad man. I hate it....

I'm working the next 3 days, so I'm taking the pills. Then Monday morning, I'll check my weight.

Hope everyone is doing well.

-Cassie-

New Month

I woke up at 117.4 and had a Godiva chocolate bar with 220 damn calories. I'm debating taking another adderall pill, but if I take it now, I'm bound to be up when the sun rises tomorrow morning. However, I could do all my dirty laundry if I end up taking it...

Mom just called, she's bring me a grilled house salad from zaxby's....yay...

Thursday night was the last time I ate, besides having half a bagel with 2 teaspoons of cream cheese(260) yesterday before my pill kicked in. I don't want to gain all this weight back... I'm not happy being over 125 lbs.


I have to keep my control...

-Cassie-

123.4 damn pounds

I've seen that same damn number for a week. I'm glad I got under 125, but this is just rediculous. My hip bones are starting to come out again, but it's not enough. My control has been coming back slowly :) kinda happy about that. I can't wait to be under 120.

The only bad thing about this; my boyfriend will flip out and start watching me again. He wouldn't hug me or kiss me because he was afraid to break me.

But I don't care! I can get thin and I will hide it from him. I will be thin, no matter what.

-Cassie_

busy week

my manager has me work 6 days this week, I was originally supposed to be off yesterday (thursday) but Stephanie called and asked if I could do a party and that she couldn't ask olivia cause she was already in the kitchen. So there goes  my day off, but I'm making more money.

My birthday is this coming up tuesday, my dad gave me his present already, got a kindle. Movie I ordered for myself came in the mail too.

my relationship with Derek is getting a little stressful. I'm the only one with a good paying job. He wakes up every morning at 6, leaves at 7 just to hang out at starbucks. Then when he manages to get an interview, "something always comes up" and he has probation fees to take care of. I can't pay his probation and save up for a car at the same time when I help pay bills for living rent free at my parents' house.

oh! I almost forgot! It seems that my body likes me again and has decided to start losing. :) I'll keep you posted.

-Cassie-

the 127 culprit

I started my damn period today at work. >.< It sucks cause I know exactly where I was and what I was doing when it started lol the plus side about me being on my period now, I won't be on it during my birthday. Yay...

Speaking of, everyone is starting to ask what I want... "Thin.." But I can't say that. So I don't know what I want. I actually haven't even given it much thought. I'm guessing I'll be working anyway. I'm racking in at least 37 hours next week. Can we say money?? :D Just when I was considering getting a new job too lol

Anywho.... I'm gonna finish watching Family Guy and get in bed. If anyone is reading this and you live in the states, you can txt me: 770 276 1674 :)

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I haven't been this fat in months!!! What am I going to do???

recap?

For the past year and a half, I have been working at Chuck E. Cheese's. I was hired as a cashier. Since July of last year, I've been doing Kid Check where I have to make sure kids leave with mom and dad and not some random psycho stranger. My managers won't let me get off this position because everyone else "lacks the personality" that I have. "Ok, so stop hiring people for other positions and start hiring them for Kid Check."

So! This week, my general manager decided to put me out in gameroom( fixing games and shit like that.) I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THEM!!! I'd rather do birthday parties!

Anyway, the good thing about me working for a year and a half, my weight has dropped from 147 to 120-126. My current weight sucks ass cause it keep fluctuating. I managed to reach 118 for about an hour lol.

I hate the fact that I'm not losing right now. I need someone to help me with it? Any takers?

xoxo Cassie